There’s a little odd thing that happens when a schizoaffective child is manic while delusional. He will say inappropriate things. Things that will make your jaw hit the floor. Things that no amount of pepper or soap on the tongue or anything else will curb.

Baby Boy has been full of those moments lately. Today’s was one of those days. As soon as Boy #1 (the bipolar one) comes in the door he is accosted bY Baby Boy who just calm as can be, looks right at him and says, “Let me ask you something. Why are you such a bitch?” And as I made a 30 second dash to the hallway and land on my face, Baby Boy had begun dancing circles around Boy #1 singing, “G. is a bitch! G. is a bitch!”

Now Boy #1 is paranoid and takes it all personally and becomes upset. Then Baby Boy whom was put in the corner and fruitlessly had it explained to him that his language and behavior were inappropriate and now he must sit quietly for 5 minutes and do his deep breathing therapy. In which he continued to sing while breathing deeply.

All I can do is sit here and laugh. I’m sure Loki is.

Our local mall is having or recently had a casting call for the producers of that Nanny reality show. I briefly entertained dragging them all down there and if casted they’d get to meet a woman who’s a bigger witch than they could ever imagine me being on a bad day right before that time of the month. But in the end it would probably mentally break the nanny’s mind and I’d end up having to take care of her, too!

And people wonder why I cannot sit through an episode of Malcolm In The Middle.

Baby Boy’s birthday is this Friday. He’s decided he just wants an outdoor party in the evening with grilled cheese, tomato soup & French fries, all cooked on the grill. And he also wants to invite our neighbors whom are friends and another couple and their children whom we are friends with. He promised he wouldn’t turn ugly even though these are people whom he’s taken upon himself to kick out of our home when he’s psychotic and delusional. And he wants cheesecake. With blueberries.

I’m taking bets.