I’ve made a decision and I’m sticking to it.

I can’t recall if I posted before about the house hunting we were doing. Keyword “were” and you may as well change that “we” to an “I.” Long story short. I married a man with Asperger’s that has never been treated in therapy and whom also turned 30 last year. Yes, I robbed the cradle but that is besides the point. See, he also has some OCD tendencies and the general thinking in the psychiatric world is that for some reason, once a person with OCD tendencies reaches their early 30’s it will either get much better for them or much worse. His has gotten worse.

I love my husband and I hate to complain so much but you try living with someone who has a fear of bodily fluids and a fear of moving. That bodily fluid thing can really screw with a girl’s self esteem when it comes to matters of sex. But I keep reminding myself that it’s his problem and not mine. Which isn’t easy especially when you live with 5 male beings in the house and they disdain everything “girly.” It’s not easy when you’re lying there hot, sweaty and satiated after sex and you open your eyes to see your husband propped up on his elbows with his hands up in the air like a surgeon waiting for gloves and hear the words, “Hurry up and get me cleaned up so I can wash my hands.” Huh? What? Okay. Such is life.

I keep reminding myself that in less than 9 yrs., all of the children but Baby Boy will be living elsewhere, be it work & school, or just one or the other. When they turn 18 they will be responsible for themselves. Cold? Perhaps, but they’ve been warned and prepared for that magical age for several years now.

The money we saved from my disability back-pay after 4 years of fighting for it? That tax refund that was going with it to put a down-payment on a house. It all went into new furnishings for the town home. If he ever gets around to painting the stairwell, the minute hallway, and our bedroom, the property manager promised new sub flooring and carpet & linoleum throughout the home. He’s got until this weekend to get it done. This had all better be done before my mother arrives bringing back Boy #1 on the 26th of next month.

But the choice I made that I’m sticking to is thus. Due to a snag that occurred during that 4 year battle for disability, I lost the ability to have a passport. That will be changing very soon. In fact, it will be changing around tax season next year. I married a basement dweller w/out a basement who was lucky enough to marry not once, but twice. With 3 bio kids to claim on taxes every year, it results in a very nice tax refund. I announced that next year, he can get his toy car. He’s been lusting for another Honda CRX since his was totaled by a drunk driver over 10 years ago. But in exchange, I want a 3 day 2 night all inclusive vacation somewhere far away from home and children. And I want one every year. And I will have one as soon as I am able to get that passport.

I let Joseph know that he is more than welcome to join me on these yearly 3 day vacations. He replied wanting to know if any of them would involve a boat or flying over large bodies of water (his OCD list also includes extreme fear of water). I replied that they most certainly would and he said, “You can go alone.” I replied, “That’s great! We won’t have to spend money on airfare to get my mother to spend 3 days with the children. You can be here with them while I get a break!”