I can’t hit a ball, never could, and I feel like I’ve been stuck in a batting cage for the last month dodging a never ending barrage of balls being pitched at me.
Where to begin? As if any of this matters other than clearing cobwebs from my mind so that maybe I’ll actually feel like blogging again instead of hiding.
Let’s start with the quack of a doctor I started seeing for primary care last fall who informed me that I have COPD, told me that it was in my medical records yet refused to show me where exactly in my records it was and when my symptoms were not getting better refused to refer me to a pulmonologist or a cardiologist even though it had been over six years since having seen either one. Well, I finally found and had my insurance change me over to an internist that seems to be relatively competent. He would have an even better time of doing his job if the afore mentioned quack would release my medical records to him.
New doctor set me up with a referral to a pulmonologist. Pulmonologist reviewed my x-rays, had me do a breathing test, said my asthma is under control and the problem is not COPD but that as I had suspected, the pulmonic valve stenosis stuff is worse and that I need to get a referral to a cardiologist as soon as possible because with the symptoms I am exhibiting it is possibly time to replace that heart valve and, “when you go, if they decide it’s time, make sure you tell them that I want to be on the surgical respiratory team because what you have is really rather rare and I’d love to be there for the surgery.” Gee, Doc, you bet, I’ll make sure you get to be there for the freak show. Still waiting to hear back from my internist on the cardiology referral.
Then there was the referral to the GYN. It had been 5 years since I’d had the lovely pap done. Yes, I know. I am a Darwin candidate. Especially since I’ve had three procedures to remove (non-HPV related thank you very much) pre-cancerous cells removed in the past. She did the exam and history, etc. Asked if had any concerns or questions. I let her know that I’ve had no less than 12 menses since the first of the year and about the cervical pain I experience during sex. She had no answer for the frequent menses other than a possible sign of perimenipause and/or stress and then told me that the cervical pain was most likely all psychological in nature. Lovely. Nothing like having the person who just peered up your vagina telling you that you have mental health issues with sex. Five days later I got a call from the GYN telling me that my pap results came back with results for a non-STD related bacterial infection and she actually apologized and said that was the cause of my cervical pain. When I asked her what caused the infection she made a statement that made my husband beam with pride when I later told him, “These types of infections are usually the result of repeat injury to the cervix, if your partner is well endowed, that is the most likely cause of the repeat injury leaving the cervix vulnerable to infection from normal bacteria.” Way to go, Joe! In the mean time, I’ve had cramps like a mofo ever since that pap three weeks ago. Made worse by the pelvic ultrasound that she scheduled and that I had done yesterday. Talk about a surprise. I hobbled my way back to the exam room and the tech pulls out the vaginal probe, “I’m going to be doing a vaginal ultrasound today, we get clearer pictures of the uterus and the ovaries this way.” Way to ruin a day.
I think I can talk briefly, in circles about how things are going concerning the information in the password protected post. Let me just say, after having played the nice neighbor once in this neighborhood and the one neighbor that became a daily part of our lives losing his mind and murdering someone, I will never again be the friendly neighbor. I don’t want to know who my neighbors are. I don’t want my children to know who our neighbors are. Baby Boy is just now starting to re-stabilize after having to deal with the trauma of another male figure in his life doing something horrifying.
On the plus side of things, I think we’ve finally found our homeschool groove. Boy #2 distracts Baby Boy and Baby Boy distracts Boy #2. Boy #2 however, is a night owl, so he stays up late, logs in and does his school work from 9pm until 2am and then sleeps until 11am. Baby Boy works on his school work from 7:30am until noon. Unconventional but it works for us. The best part is that it keeps Boy #1 and Boy #2 from their previous routine of bitching at each other for at least an hour every night at bedtime until one of them gives up and falls asleep.
Another positive, the topamax has done wonders at keeping the migraines at bay and even seems to be helping the fibromyalgia a bit. It’s also a wonderful thing to have the flexeril on hand for the days when the spasms and spasticity would otherwise have me tethered to the walker.
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